Domestic Violence

Domestic violence is behavior designed to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Partners can be women or men, gay or straight, married, living together, or dating. Domestic violence happens regardless of age, race, class, culture, religion, or education.

There is no “typical” abuser. Abusers are often publicly friendly to others and their partners. Women can be abusers; men can be victims. Abuse is not an accident or the result of drinking, drugs, or stress; it is a deliberate, learned behavior.

Domestic violence consists of physical, sexual, emotional, or economic actions, stalking, or threats.

Physical abuse includes the following:

• Pushing, hitting, slapping, biting, kicking, choking
• Using a weapon to threaten or cause injury
• Driving recklessly to cause injury
• Forcing the victim to leave or preventing the victim from leaving her/his home
• Abandoning the victim in an unsafe or unfamiliar place
• Hurting the victim’s children or pets

Sexual abuse includes the following:

• Insulting in sexual ways or calling sexual names
• Demanding sex when the victim is hurt, sick, or tired
• Forcing or manipulating the victim into particular sexual acts
• Insisting that the victim dress in a more sexual way than what makes her/him comfortable
• Hurting the victim with weapons or objects during sex

Emotional abuse includes the following:

• Name-calling
• Acting jealous and showing lack of trust
• Isolating from family and friends
• Monitoring where the victim goes and with whom
• Withholding affection as punishment
• Humiliating
• Threatening to hurt the victim, family, friends, children, pets

Economic abuse includes the following:

• Taking or keeping the victim’s paycheck
• Insisting that the victim doesn’t work or keeping her/him from going to work
• Withholding money